Milwaukee As Written: Milwaukie Wis
Nov 15th 1886
Your letter of the 13thEditorial Note: See F00050. was preceded As Written: preceeded a few hours by one from Bro Gill, announcing my disposal from Manager of the C. S. Pub Society;
If it is of God, all will be well, if it is Mortal Mind or the work of Mesmerism, the penalty is not mine to reap, or pay. Whatever may be my opinion of their methods, or business, is of no consequence. I did not come to BostonEditorial Note: Boston, Massachusetts for the sake of being a manager of the Pub Society, but solely to work for a CauseEditorial Note: The cause of Christian Science.: and accepted the name of Manager, believing that as such; it might facilitate our effort. The Journal was your child,- God's child to me. When you sent for me, and ere I started, and since then our prayer has been, that whatever of self, ambition, or aught of personal sense entered into my motive and actions, that the dear God would show it, hence however bitter some things appeared, I have accepted them, and tried like Paul, though very feebly I confess, to rejoice in disappointmentsII Cor 12:10 Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ’s sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong. . And now dear friend that is all past, blotted out, there is no disappointment or loss on my part. I have only one regret on the part of the Society's actions; it will be the cause of much disappointment to the dear lady, Mrs Church, whom I expect to be in Boston when I return, and who expects to assist me in carrying out the different plans I had begun, to increase the circulation of the Journal. This I expected to do at my own expense, to which I have made some outlay already. I have not used a dollar of my percentAs Written:per cent, yet out of the Society funds. Now please dear friend do not say a word of this to any: I did it for God, it was, and is His. He has rewarded me a thousandfoldAs Written:thousand fold. Do you think I would part with what I have gathered from my experience in BostonAs Written:B— and more especially at every interview with you for what little expense I have been to.
There is only one thing that puzzles me in this, and that is whether it is some error of my own that is the cause of my very unbusinessnesslike As Written: unbusiness-like disposal, but I shall patiently wait for the answer from God, knowing I shall never forget it when thus answered.
Truly my friend does ScienceEditorial Note: Christian Science continually reveal that nothing of this world of sense is worth seeking.
One thing I can honestly claim, ere ever I took up Science: I am not vindictive, had, nor have the least desire to retaliateAs Written:retalliate; Surely you do not think that I would attempt to govern or influence the mind of any because of any fancied wrong. Ah no! I seek to know only Christ. Believe me, I am only seeking to reach that knowledge which tells me when and how God speaks: the knowledge of His will.
I shall return to Boston, and adjust my affairs and then go where God directs; and I know he will guide me, for I have given myself up entirely, unreservedly to that guidance. I shall see you of course; and ask that your aid so tenderly offered, shall be given not to soften any disappointment; but in promoting and facilitating our further labors for this Cause. and of this we can consult when I meet you-
If the Society have mistaken their duty, I am not the one to say, or judge. My duty is clear, to be like Christ, and Animal Magnetism cannot beguile me into a false sense of duty. (I have one request to make of the Society; to use some wise method, so that my name shall disappear from the Journal without exciting unnecessary and detrimental comment from the opposition; we must not ignore their quickness to make use of every appearance of discord, to harm us. The Society should remove the Journals etc from 167 West Chester Park, by Monday next, as it would not be right for me to leave the lady in expectation that I shall be a permanent occupant; will Bro Frye speak to Mr Bradley of this, and I will write the lady to care for my personal property.) I hope to be with you the later part of next week. And now let me assure you of my appreciation of your kind and sympathetic letter. It took much from your valuable time, which I also appreciate. God is with us I know, and has a field of usefulness As Written: usefullness for us somewhere, so I wait on the Lord.